a Change.

It has been quite a while since I've posted...
At the moment I'm in Rome (7:33am) for a congress with the Focolare Movement from young people all around the world. Every moment is one to be treasured because time is flying by. It's almost been 4 months!

On a side note, I shaved my head...not for cancer ...just because.
Shaved...

ok..Only the bottom half of my head; I'll post a picture.
I told my grandma that I shaved my head like my brother (not totally like him) and she just laughed; I told my momma and she said I am so courageous.
I mean you only live once, life is short, so you gotta live it to the FULLEST. and do some crazy things while you're at it.

Word of Life

The word of life for last month, the short phrase from the Gospel that is put into practice, was "Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God."


From the Word of Life Reflection (small excerpts):
Purity is the fruit of living the Word, of living all the Words of Jesus which free us from our so-called attachments, which we inevitably fall into if our hearts are not in God and in his teachings. These can be attachments to things, to people, to ourselves. But if our heart is focused on God alone, all the rest falls away.
So, then, the fruit of this constantly re-acquired purity is that we can ‘see’ God, which means we can understand his work in our lives and in history, hear his voice in our hearts, and recognise him where he is: in the poor, in the Eucharist, in his Word, in our communion with others, in the Church.
 It is a foretaste of the presence of God which already begins in this life, as we ‘walk by faith, not by sight’ (2 Cor. 5:7), until the time when, ‘we will see face to face’ (1 Cor. 13:12) forever.


So as I reflect upon this month and how I've lived this Word of Life...
This month I would say has been pretty rocky, as I hit some bumps and failed many times to love. With my experience with my roommate whom I struggle to get along with because our personalities are so different. Also other experiences I had with two of my close friends, which again I didn't think before saying unpleasant words. But I think the importance of all these three experiences is that I first asked for forgiveness and then in small ways I tried to act upon it. Small ways such as just asking how was their day, embracing them with a hug, consciously staying more attentive to my words, or helping them with their chores. Blessed are the pure in heart... which for me was in asking for forgiveness because if I didn't start again with all three of them, then I definitely wouldn't be able to start again with them. Then to be able to 'see' God meaning to be able to recognize him where he is...which was in my neighbour, in the three friends that I failed to love. To ask for forgiveness and to act upon it helped me to be able to be renewed and to be able to see them freely with "new eyes and a new heart."


So this month's Word of Life: "Nothing will be impossible for God." (Lk 1:37) (Click on the link to see the full reflection)


If you don't want to read the full reflection, here is small excerpts:
These words open us up to an unlimited confidence in the love of God the Father, because if God exists and his being is Love, what logically follows is that we can have complete trust in him. In his power are all graces: temporal and spiritual, possible and impossible. And he gives them to those who ask and also to those who do not ask because, as the Gospel says, the Father “makes his sun rise on the bad and the good” (Mt 5:45). What he does ask of all of us is to act the way he does, to have the same universal love, supported by faith
How should we put these words into practice? At one time or another we all face difficult, painful situations both in our personal lives and in our relationships with others. We sometimes feel helpless because we realize we have attachments to things and to people that enslave us and from whose chains we would like to be freed. Often too we find ourselves up against walls of indifference and selfishness and we feel discouraged in the face of events that seem to be more than we can handle.
In these moments, the Word of Life can pick us up. Jesus lets us experience our own limitations, not to discourage us, but to help us understand more deeply that “Nothing will be impossible for God,” and to prepare us to experience the extraordinary power of his grace, which is manifested precisely when we see that we cannot manage on our own.


So let's put this into practice that: "NOTHING is impossible for God." (Lk 1:37)

Love freely

CIAO CIAO :)

adesso, il mio italiano e meglio, pero faccio tanto sbagli. provo sempre parlare in italiano, e un po strano quando parlo inglese perche io ho comminciato pensare in italiano! Ma adesso quando scrivo in italiano, e difficile!!!

Il weekend scorso, Geppina e venuta con noi. Propio BELLISIMO. Basta italiano.

hahah....slowly slowly I almost understand everything now and I speak italian probably 90% of the time :)

Everyday I'm reminded of how fortunate I am here. Everyone keeps reminding me to treasure each moment I have here because this experience is one that will imprint my heart, soul and mind. 

To describe the place where I am in one sentence: I feel as if I'm in heaven on earth. Why?

because I live with almost 50 girls from around the world, we all come from different backgrounds, cultures, and we are so different. But we only try to love one another as we would want to be loved. Where there is love... heaven on earth is possible. 

But obviously I have written before already in my previous experiences, I failed many times to love, but what is important and beautiful is the chance to start again. And I would have to say the person I fail most with is my lovely BROTHER. It's definitely different to see my brother go to university and not being home to always check up on him and of course boss him around sometimes? I've been able to talk to him once in a while to ask him about his school, and life of course. But it's really difficult to see him grow up and I'm not physically there to help him when he's in need. Especially when the way he does things and the choices he makes is not the way I would act in the same situation. And obviously being the sister I am, every time I talk to him I want to just lecture and lecture him; it's more like advise him but you know? 

And a few days I talked to him again and likewise he said something to me that really hurt me to point that I seriously had tears in my eyes, it wasn't something that was directed towards me, but it just showed the way he prioritizes his life is very different from mine. But through this Jesus Forsaken (suffering) in my heart, I embraced it right away, and with joy. I knew that I can always advise him and try to see his life through my own eyes, but this time I wanted to love him for the person he is, and the way he wants to be loved, not the way I want to love him. Something so simple, yet so hard to do. 

Even though I love him so much, so much; I need to let him be free to make his own choices, prioritize his own life, and let him be. I said to him, "Sometimes I don't understand you, and you probably don't understand me, but I am seriously happy for you as long as you are happy too." It took me probably 20 years of life to come to this point. Only reason: I LOVE my brother, don't know how to express it more, but I love him so much I want to let him be free. Usually, I would have felt really down, but this time I loved him in the way he wants to be loved (that is to let him be free), I felt a supernatural peace and joy in my heart. The joy that is only born in suffering as I had mentioned before in my past experiences of Jesus Forsaken (suffering). Can that be the secret to life? 

Credo di si (I think so).

FOTOS!

Nov 3- Festa per Ester dell Cameroon
Teme della notte (Theme of the night): CIRCUS!

ECCOLA!

Eccochi! (Here we are)

Con Clarinha di Brasile e Ceci di Paraguay

Nov 4 - Autunno!

Con Aninha di Brasile

Ancora con Clarinha!

Nov 4 Sera- Il Compleanno di Elsy

MY BOSS MORENA!

Nov 10- Lezione sul "Rosso"

Nov 11- Basket!
IO (ME)!

YEEEAA

GUARDA (Look)!

CHE BELLE! (How beautiful!)

Nov 12- Festa per Tefy di Ecuador e Anna di Australia

con Rayassa di Brasile!

Nov 13- Raccogliere le oliva (Olive Picking)

OLIVE

Nov 13 Sera: un Battesimo (Baptism)
IO e Maria Chiara (Calgary)

CIBO (FOOD!)

Con i ragazzi e Rayassa di Brasile

Nov 14- Festa per Maria
suo piccolo fratello (her younger brother)

awww PUPPY DOG FACE

Mi piace  questo bambino! 

Con Rayassa di Brasile

Nov 17- Qui LINDO! (Portuguese)- How Beautiful!

Nov 18- Festa per POPE (not PAPA BENEDICT)!

Con Paola (my Godsister!)

Nov 19- Festa per Ana Maria (Calgary)
Teme della notte: Yoga! 

Ana Maria!

Espanolo!

siamo state "MC" (Me and Ceci were the MC's)

Nov 22- Pranzo con le Pope

Pollo con Prunes?  (Chicken with prunes and something else)

 DOLCE! (Sweet)

CIAOO di TUTTO IL mondo!

Starting again.

living with 50 girls has been lots of festas, cake, chocolate, candid moments...but obviously not everyone I will become best of friends with...but i have definitely gotten really close to a few :)

so there's a girl from Ecuador, I stay in the same room with her and she has a personality that is hard for me to get along with because at times she says things that she means good, but the way she says it has a bossy tone. But I still try to love her the best I can day in and day out, every time she says something I try to listen ...but I failed a few days ago...

She said something to me which I didn't understand the reason behind it, and the words I used to respond to what she said were very straight forward and could have been taken as rude. It was really a miscommunication between both of us; but I knew the way I responded to her wasn't the right way. After that, she left and I just did as she told me. But obviously I was wrong in the tone that I used to respond to her...but I guess it was a buildup of just constantly trying to love her in all the moments before this one...that I just failed. So later on that day I went to mass, and this is what I was reminded of...

"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." (Matthew 5:23)

So after dinner, I wanted to speak with her. But funny enough she approached me and she says to me, "Do you want to talk with me?" And then we talked and I apologized firstly...and it was a beautiful moment of reigniting the unity between us because it was really lost. I explained to her about some problems I had with her, and the same she also talked to me about her problems with me. It really helped me to take away the barriers I had to love her because she was getting harder and harder to love.

It really reminded me of "reality" because there are always people we deal with on a daily basis that we are the best of friends with, but still those are the people we "need" to love because it's "difficult." It's only real love when it's difficult. So it was a reality check and a moment of starting again as I failed, but most importantly I was able to begin again. 


So apologizing is the first step. Words mean nothing if they aren't put into action. So these past few days, I've been extremely attentive to show her that I am truly ready to start again with her. In the small acts of love such as her leg was hurting and I helped give her a massage or the other day I was going to give this chocolate cake to my good friend but I decided to give it to her. They are just small steps I'm trying to make to rebuild our friendship. We can only really do small acts with great LOVE.

some thoughts

CIAO tutti :)
questa settimana, io ho fatto una promessa con Clarinha delle Brazile per uno giorno- no posso parlare inglese. SOLO ITALIANO.

okay that's about it for my italian...probably not grammatically correct but what i said there was that: this week, i made a promise with Clarinha from Brazil for one day- I can't speak english - only italian. I failed a few times, but other than that I was actually able to commit to it. So since coming to Italy...I've just fell in LOVE...
with learning languages...in my "stanza (room)" I'm with two girls from Ecuador...and they said they would teach me spanish once I master italian...seriously anybody that comes from a spanish speaking country begins to understand italian within the first day, and starts speaking within the first week. I started to understand the basic italian after around 3 weeks, started speaking around that time too. Now I can mostly understand everything...not when they speak super fast, and speaking is improving...but It's unbelievable how easy it is for them...also the portuguese speaking girls. I have found a passion in just learning about the culture and language of all the girls that are here...

interesting things...

1) south americans all brush their teeth after every meal ..at least 3 times a day
they think I'm so "dirty" because I brush twice a day...
2) south americans for every single thing they eat have to add salt before even trying the food...they enjoying clogging their arteries :)
3) brazilians are extremely loud, crazy, love to bite people (or a few of them do)
4) when people greet you they will kiss you on the cheek...not actually touch your cheek, but a kiss..even strangers you just meet...hugging isn't common
5) when I went to florence, there were gelato, panini, and cafe shops EVERYWHERE...like we have mcD's or timmy's
6) in europe...they have a sesta midday...after lunch until around 3pm where everything is closed except supermarkets or convenience stores...its their break to sleep, eat, and relax...i LOVE IT
7) Koreans here love their...THEIR food...and whenever they can they put spicy taste in their foods
8) Vietnamese are conservative and i love when they speak italian or english...i can't help but imitate it in my head.
9) When the girls from Jordan, Palestine speak arabic...even when they are calm speaking to eachother...their language sounds like they are angry at eachother
10) all these things i mentioned are all things that i've learned to love and admire because every culture is so different ....but I have to say that i love brazilians....and I will definitely go there one day because ...

they are wild, crazy, loud and get so excited over CHOCOLATE.
and you probably have seen a lot of pictures with me and Clara (Clarinha) from Brazil...she's kinda awesome and a new found bestie :)

Spread the love.

It's been crazy these past few weeks as the weekend before last weekend we went to Assisi, where St. Francis and St. Clair are from. I uploaded the pictures from that trip on facebook.

And this weekend, we get to take a trip to Trent (5 hours away), where the Focolare Movement started. So it's getting harder and harder to find time to post. But nonetheless my experience here is a gift for me, and evermore I want to share it with you...

So as most of you probably know I'm really close to my grandma (my mom's mom). When I was in Toronto or Hamilton (where I go to school), I would visit her at least once a week. Also I try my best to call her everyday, but since I'm in Italy I call her every other day. My chinese is definitely improving, but it's still pretty crappy. So our conversations are just about the same thing everyday..."Grandma, did you go swimming this morning?" What are you doing now? What did you do today? What are you watching on TV? 

The same thing each day...day in and day out.

But there's so much more of me that I want to share ...especially about my faith. She knows that I'm part of the Focolare, but that's about it.

It's really hard since she doesn't believe in God, so I've never tried sharing about my faith or anything to do with God. 

However, last week the grandma of Michelle (from Philippines) passed away, and I was really touched by how at peace she was with the situation. That's probably because she understood it was God's will for her grandma and that her grandma has really lived to her fullest. So I thought that the part of my faith is so important to me, and it defines who I am. I really have tried my best to show her my faith through my actions and I can see the difference in my grandma throughout these years. She always tells me that she loves me and misses me to death, hugs me and kisses me. This is something she doesn't do, even to her kids. So I can really see the love she has for me because I really try my best to make her feel loved. 

So in my heart I always have a great desire to show God's love to everyone through my life, but my grandma is someone whom I also wanted to do the same. So I called her as usual and I began as usual asking her the same questions I do every time I call her, but then I started to tell her...

"Grandma, I want to tell you how happy and joyful I am being in Italy. There's no other place I would want to be but to be here. But you know why I'm so happy, it is because everyone here, all 50 people I'm living with around the world know how to "LOVE." Everyone tries their best to always put others "first." Putting other's needs before their own. Something that is contrary to the "ME" society we live in. And Grandma you know how much I love you always, coming to visit you and calling you. This is because I believe that God loves you. I know you don't believe in God, but I always want to show you his love."

Before telling her I prayed to the Holy Spirit that He would give me the words to share with my grandma as my chinese is so bad. It was truly God's grace that I was able to share with my grandma...in a very very simple way, but anything we do if it's out of "LOVE" then it's all that matters.

This was our conversation in short, as I had to repeat and explain it a few times before she understood. But at the end I asked her if she understood what I had said and she responded with a simple yes. And a few days later I called her, and asked if she remembered what I had said, and she said, "You are happy there, everyone's happy around you." And I repeated, " because everyone knows how to love and put other's needs first.

Also I started to share with her small experiences of how I try to love the people around me....sharing with her that I gave 5 people haircuts, and even though I was tired one after the other, I told her I still continued to do it happily because I wanted to love them. And my mom told me that my grandma had also made a small act of love as she brought her friend groceries because her friend has pain in her foot. So in a small way now, my conversations with my grandma is not about the same thing everyday no more, it's more than that as now I can share with her just like I share here on my blog of how I put the Gospel into practice.