Starting again.

living with 50 girls has been lots of festas, cake, chocolate, candid moments...but obviously not everyone I will become best of friends with...but i have definitely gotten really close to a few :)

so there's a girl from Ecuador, I stay in the same room with her and she has a personality that is hard for me to get along with because at times she says things that she means good, but the way she says it has a bossy tone. But I still try to love her the best I can day in and day out, every time she says something I try to listen ...but I failed a few days ago...

She said something to me which I didn't understand the reason behind it, and the words I used to respond to what she said were very straight forward and could have been taken as rude. It was really a miscommunication between both of us; but I knew the way I responded to her wasn't the right way. After that, she left and I just did as she told me. But obviously I was wrong in the tone that I used to respond to her...but I guess it was a buildup of just constantly trying to love her in all the moments before this one...that I just failed. So later on that day I went to mass, and this is what I was reminded of...

"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." (Matthew 5:23)

So after dinner, I wanted to speak with her. But funny enough she approached me and she says to me, "Do you want to talk with me?" And then we talked and I apologized firstly...and it was a beautiful moment of reigniting the unity between us because it was really lost. I explained to her about some problems I had with her, and the same she also talked to me about her problems with me. It really helped me to take away the barriers I had to love her because she was getting harder and harder to love.

It really reminded me of "reality" because there are always people we deal with on a daily basis that we are the best of friends with, but still those are the people we "need" to love because it's "difficult." It's only real love when it's difficult. So it was a reality check and a moment of starting again as I failed, but most importantly I was able to begin again. 


So apologizing is the first step. Words mean nothing if they aren't put into action. So these past few days, I've been extremely attentive to show her that I am truly ready to start again with her. In the small acts of love such as her leg was hurting and I helped give her a massage or the other day I was going to give this chocolate cake to my good friend but I decided to give it to her. They are just small steps I'm trying to make to rebuild our friendship. We can only really do small acts with great LOVE.